projectunbreakable:

PICTURE TEXT AND TRANSLATION

Norwegian

2000 - 8ÅR

“Ting er vanskelig nå, men det vil bli bedre.

 Bare husk at uansett hva, så er ingenting av dette din feil.

 Du har ikke gjort noe galt.”

2011 - 19ÅR

“Hva forventet du?

 Du kan ikke gå ut kledd sånn og forvente at ingenting skal skje.

 Sånn er livet

 Venn deg til det eller blir hjemme.”

English

2000 - 8 years old

“Things are difficult now, but they will get better.

 Just remember that no matter what, none of this is your fault.

 You have done nothing wrong.”

2011 - 19 years old

“What did you expect?

 You can’t go outside dressed like that and expect nothing to happen.

 That’s life.

 Deal with it or stay home.”

—

STORY

Rather than writing something the abusers have said, I chose to focus on the reaction and responses from those around me. 

As a child, I was molested by my neighbour on a daily basis. This happened for 2 years before it was discovered. At that time, I was met with lots of support and love. There was no question about who was at fault; him. People still say and think that about my experience as a child.

But I hardly go out anymore, because almost everytime I go out, I get molested. Sometimes by strangers, sometimes by people I know. It’s really painful, and it’s adding to the problems I’m already dealing with because of my past. Now, however, the reactions I get are completely different. It’s still no question who is at fault. But now, the one who is to blame, is me. I’m responsible for everything these strangers and “friends” do to me. 

In many ways, this is what hurts the most. The words from my loved ones and people around me, hurt more than the words of the people who molested me. I’m thinking that, alright, I can take this. I will get over what those people (the molesters) did to me. But at this point, it feels close to impossible for me to get over what other people are doing to me. Blaming me, shaming me. The people who are supposed to be supporting me, are doing that. 

It’s so unbelievably painful.

—

Thank you to the reader who submitted this. If you have an image you would like to submit, please email me at grace@50extraordinarywomen.com.. And if you’re in NYC, MA, NJ, or Washington DC, then I would potentially be able to photograph you in the near future - just send me an email.